the last time i had a smile on my face was ....i dunno but i think the best memory i've ever had of smiling was from having a conversation with this one girl. Her environment was so different form mine yet she perfectly understand everything that i said and vice versa
that was truly a moment to remember

its impossible to know what lies in the future and it is impossible to know when it will arrive. but i can assure u it will. it may not be how you would of wanted it to be, but it will be what you want in its puriest form

I would like to learn to be 'me'. not me as me but the me i was designed to be. there me that purpose was established before me even existed. there is me then 'me'. me is who does daily tasks. me thinks, wonders, speculates, and occasionally dreams. but 'me'. 'me' does nothing.'me' simply exists. there is no need for 'me' to think because 'me' already knows.'me' does not wonder because 'me' doesnt need to.'me does not imagine because 'me' resides in my imagination. the question is how can I be 'me'?The answer is I cant be 'me'. But 'me' can be I.

Ever feel like no matter what it is 'written in stone'. On occasion i am certain that the future can undoubtedly be altered to an alternative, but then there are times that i know it will be. But does it have to. I mean if there is a way to change what 'will' then that would mean that another event 'will' occur. In order for a bird to lay his nest, he must have leaves,twig, other objects, but the most important is the foundation the very nest he builds in a tree derives from the roots of where it will be. in retrospect, there can only be a future if the past is remembered and the present is accounted for. So then i guess what as to be must be or else there will never be
 

I believe in many things that are in correlation with one another. one of them being karma. but not in the sense that u do something good for someone then something good will happen for you, yet i do believe in good fortune. i believe it is not so much strifing to be a good person but rather demonstrate why u are not a 'bad' person. I dont mean bad n good in terms of good and bad things but good and bad karma. Karma, to me, is energy not equality. some have the power to change alot but resist. i believe this to truly be bad karma.


long story shortened

Karma is the manifestation of one's self through action, not thought or beliefs which is why i believe that serial killer has the potential to be good and a holy man is not immune from evil acts. Karma is just what u choose to do when you are conscious of the outcome, rather it be completely or partially.

have u ever felt that all of your energy is going to the right direction. like u looking right at you object dead in eye. but what about when that energy gets misplaced and u lose your direction. or what about when u suddenly blink and ur objective is no longer in front of you. where did it. where does it go. I wonder sometimes what i need to do in order to longer come to this familiar conclusion. seems as if no matter how many times i try this or that, the outcome is always the same
failure.
what could possibly be my inspiration?
what seems to motivate me is the same that causes me to mudilate,hyperthetically speaking.

this is a question to anyone or everyone who may have an answer

STEP 1 the first and easiest step it where u decide the path

STEP 2 usually after the first encounter of conflict but for the most part the point in which the path is non interchangable

STEP 3 failure

What is step three??

(by the way any questions please message me)

today something happened that had never happned b4. its was totally out of the ordinary in every way possible. i'm still going through it in my head and it has yet to make sense to me. though i have come with an answered epiphany that constantly torn me between to intersecting questions.
now i understand that in order to get where i'm trying to go,figuratively speaking, i must be able to not subject or assume anything about anything. i have to simply take everything the same and except them as they are
lol now it seems so simple like i knew it for years but i guess i have i just needed to see the problem to understand the solution XD